I Know.

It amazes me how even the thought, the mere intention of something is often times enough to set things rolling.
I have an inner shaman I have felt for quite some time, and known I need to connect with… it has been made crystal clear to me lately— from several sources— that now is the time to DO it. “All right, I will!” I determined… but I have not had the time to sit and specifically reach out to connect with him.
Has that hindered my awareness from shifting, and noticing subtle changes around me and within me?
Some shamanic or medicine-persons inherit their abilities or titles from their family line, but many more are initiated into the role after a severe illness or near-death experience, returning to this plane with new eyes and new understanding… I think I now have both of these baptisms.
I have what I’ve always felt… what I’ve inherited from past lives and brought with me to this life… and, after last week’s sickness and its accompanying constant pain, I seem to have returned with a new appreciation of my body and everything around me… I cannot remember a time I was more grateful to BE in a human body! I have always been more aware of the fact I am not from here, and of the difficulties, frustrations, and limits of this place…
And now I FEEL.
I have always connected to trees… drawn them… painted them… touched them and felt their Life… and even before recent events have noticed an increased “sight” of how far that connection extends, and how easily I can “tune in” to a tree and feel it down my spine… 
And now I’ve begun to notice I can feel more than trees…  the fire of the candle across the room… the clouds above me, miles high… the grass rippling in the wind… the very Earth Herself… and with each… such a humbling, whole, complete, and empty feeling!
Yet the most awe-striking thing of all— I fit in.
I belong.
In this openness… this new level of letting go… there is… LOVE.
I am loved.
Where is this journey taking me? How far does it go?
I know at least one city it is floating me towards:
If I am opening at these levels to more and more Life around me, then it follows that this spiral will eventually naturally embrace humans as well… Of course I already feel others, read their energy, connect to them when doing intuitive readings and healings for them, but to what depths will even these go?
There are gifts awakening in me which will require continued openness, trust, honesty, and Love— with mySelf AND the Universe. My studying and meditating on Warriorship lately has been revealing and confirming all this. To be any sort of strong, begin inside. Fully rooted and unshakably confident in mySelf… Know who I am. Know where I’m going. Know that I know. Know that I hear. Know that I see.


  1. Yes!I was just thinking about this very thing as I continued my work here this afternoon… Why have I closed my eyes all this time? I've always known it was there… what was I afraid of? Why have I not wanted to see? Why have I not wanted to feel?The more I unfold my Life, the more fear I find embalmed and buried. Ah, but the fresh air of bravery dissolves it as mere mist….

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